Marketing explained with cows. Pic by Chris Marchant

Online marketing explained with cows

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It can be a challenge, especially if you're new to the game, understanding what marketing jargon means. Inevitably you end up having to go and find some definitions to help keep track of what everyone is going on about.

So if online marketing is a scary and unfamiliar world, with danger everywhere, like this:

Then it's time to see how our bovine friends can help clarify what the marketing world is on about.

Social marketing

You have a cow.
You share a clip of it chasing a friend on FaceBook.
Everyone wants to meet your cow.

Social influence

You have a cow.
A reporter interviews you about it.
People start asking you about cows.

Affiliate marketing

Your neighbour has a cow.
You tell your friends about it.
He shares some of its milk with you.

Traffic

You have a cow.
You put it on the side of the road.
People stop to look at it.

Spam

You have a cow.
You put it in the middle of the road, stopping traffic.
A few people buy some viagra from you; so you put more cows in the road.

SEO

You have a cow.
You put up a road sign with "Cow" in the title.
Passers by stop to look at the sign; you sell them milk.

Content

You have a cow.
You write about it.
Your cow gets covered in the news.

Advertising

You and your neighbour each have a cow.
You both put signs up to advertise them.
You pay a premium to move your sign directly in front of the neighbour's.

ROI (Return On Investment)

You have a cow.
You pay $50 to dye it pink.
People buy tickets to see your cow; you earn $1000.

Conversions

You have a cow.
You spread the word that it is amazing.
People pay to look at it.

Fake it 'til you make it

You tell everyone you have a cow.
You don't.
Enough people buy tickets to see your cow that you are able to buy one.

Reality

You have a cow.
No-one cares.

Hopefully with those common marketing terms nicely explained, the world of marketing is much more friendly, like this:

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